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5 Reasons Women Don’t Get Caught Cheating (I saw this interesting article on Blackplanet)

5 Reasons Women Don’t Get Caught Cheating

By Jerry Barrow, Senior Editor December 8, 2009 2:56 pm


This is not a defense of infidelity. Nor is it an examination into the reasons men and women cheat. This is an honest assessment of why women, for the most part, are rarely caught when they do cheat.

This is not about the mistress. We hear about the mistresses in the news all of the time, usually because they want to be known. At this moment I’m talking about the women in relationships, girlfriends or wives, who choose to creep but don’t get caught.

Why am I talking about this? In the wake of the Tiger Woods scandal one of my peers posed the question, “When was the last time we heard of a celebrity scandal involving a woman cheating?” You could hear crickets in the room. Yes, there was that Kelis rumor back in the spring and people speculated all day long about Faith Evans and Tupac but there was never any proof, and there damn sure weren’t any public confessionals. So why don’t women get caught? Here is what I think along with some personal insight from our good friend Phonte Coleman of Little Brother and The Foreign Exchange.

Reason #1: Women are smarter than men.

This isn’t a patronizing statement to try and get the women on my side. The fact is when it comes to stepping out women just think about things that men don’t. Where a dude will call his boy after the fact to say “Yo, son, if anybody asks where I was last night, I was with you” a woman will have it planned out days in advance with an airtight alibi.

Reason #2: Men don’t want to know

Some of my peers mistake this for men being more “trusting” than women, a theory I don’t necessarily believe. I think it’s more a case of naivite than trust. Men are the hunters. It just doesn’t’ occur to us that our woman could possibly be cheating on us. So even if reason #1 doesn’t apply and your girl has a drunken, spontaneous fling with the DJ from the boat ride, it’s the last thing we want to comprehend. She was out with the girls and that’s all we need to know.

Reason #3 Men don’t want YOU to know

And when I say YOU, I mean the world. Even in the face of irrefutable evidence and a woman is somehow caught, a man is less likely to go public because of his pride and ego.

“When a man is unhappy he cries in the dark,” says Phonte. “When a woman is unhappy, she makes a concerted effort to ensure that EVERYBODY around her is miserable.”

Could you imagine Michael Jordan getting cheated on by Juanita then having to face Larry Bird and Isaiah Thomas on the court? The trash talk would never end. If Kobe found out his wife had a threesome in Colorado do you think he’s leaking text messages to TMZ? Hell no.

“Men don’t get all RUNTELDAT when it comes to exposing their affairs,” Phonte expounds. “Take the Tiger Woods situation. Let’s flip the script and say it was a rich and powerful woman like Halle Berry or Oprah or some lady. Oprah been married for years.[Ed: Note, she never technically married Steadman, but we get what he means] one day she gets caught up sleeping around with a sidekick. Do you think for one second that ALL HER OTHER lovers are gonna come out on some, “well yeah, I was sleeping with Oprah too? ‘Made men don’t make statements’ (c) Hov If I was sleeping with Oprah and her spot got blew up, a guy like me is thinking of how to use that case for leverage without puttin all our dirt out there. So PERSONALLY..I’m hittin Oprah up from an undisclosed location on a blocked number like, “I’m so sorry for all the trouble you’re going through. Just wanted to reassure you that you have nothing to worry about from me. I would never do you that way. If you need to talk, you know how to contact me.” MO MONEY! MO MONEY! MO MONEY! (c) damon wayans

Reason #4 Women Have More To Lose

Let’s face it: women are more forgiving than men. Men don’t even like the idea of their women sleeping with their friends BEFORE they’re together so God forbid they get stepped out on during the relationship. We’ll either leave or start cheating ourselves to justify it. Furthermore, if a woman steps out and becomes pregnant, far fewer men will stay with her and raise another man’s child, than the countless women who have remained in relationships with men after finding out they’ve gotten another woman pregnant. With consequences like this women typically take extra steps, precautions and are just more discerning overall with their sex partners.

Reason #5 The Average Man Doesn’t Want The Headache Of A Married Woman

“Granted, there are some guys who don’t give a *CENSORED*, but generally speaking? Nah.” declares Phonte. “Why? because he has no control over that situation. It’s one thing if *I’m* cheating. I can say without a shadow of a doubt that no matter what, come hell or high water, no matter how much I think I *love* this *CENSORED*…..I’m not leaving home. A guy will be on that good Ray Charles: “I’m not leaving my family.” And a man will do everything in his power to keep both lives separate.

Women on the other hand can be much more emotional and allow those emotions to cloud their judgment. If I’m sleeping with a married woman, who’s to say that one day she won’t break down and decide to tell her husband everything? Or have a moment in church and she decides to “give her sins to the Lord” or something?

And then you gotta deal with the potential of confrontation with her husband and I don’t know that man or what he might do. Ain’t nobody tryinna get shot over a piece of *CENSORED *.

Do you know a woman that got caught cheating? What happened? Men, have you ever caught your woman cheating? Ladies, have you ever been caught cheating? What did you do? Speak on it!

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Rubbish article is what this is...... Total rubbish.
Infact it is a dumb piece of information that serves no purpose...
....except for mere entertainment.
@kehinde ur comment is rather too hash on somebody who is trying to make a point.
nice article looks like olajide does not like the idea of women cheating there is no reason to call this rubbish
! Mr witer nice piece .
I dont think if we should regards someone's idea as rubbish. I believe in every write up, someone may learn from it. Before you conclude read the write up for at list 3times.

My suggestion is, apply wisdom in anything your doing with either your wife or your girl friend. It is wise to know about thing happen among us.
.
I think it is right, it just proves a point
everybody cheat's except if u ve repented
Its an interesting piece, i kinda like most of the points written. Come to think of it, why will a man's infidelity be made public than a woman's.
nice write up. but wait o! this one make sense why we no dey catch women? ehnn? but worse pass men. monitor that ya woman well well. i don comot for this topic. chap chap!
this is a lesson to everyone

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