Sex in the church ?
I know there was an announcement that all the Singles in the Church should wait after service, how come you didn't wait?
"Because the Singles fellowship in my Church have no understanding of what Singles really need. Moreover, if I had gone for the meeting, it will be full of children than my mates. Challenges I am confronted with are not addressed, and I am tired of wasting my time. I would rather go for a show or watch a movie with my friends".
She is actually 37years. She's involved with her boss in the office. Has a nice apartment that is used for cell meetings of her Church. Lost the virginity she has kept for 33 years to her Pastor, and can't have him totally to herself because of Pastor's wife, neither can she have her boss completely too because of his wife. Her boss actually told her never to call him on phone because of his wife and promise to make all the calls. So she has to wait for his calls, and when he doesn't, you may never imagine the pain she has to go through not hearing from him as he may not come to the office for some days because of business appointments he has to make all around and outside the country. After all she is in love, only that she loves the wrong person.
When they first started the relationship, he made sure she was always on his Team, and so they travelled together. But now, rumors has it that he is seeing some new girl in the office, and will do everything to make sure that the two ladies don't meet and get heartbroken in the process. He is a born again Christian and will not want to hurt any of his Mistresses. So if our lady in question doesn't see him most of the time at work, she is sure to meet him at Church which is where they actually met and started the affair. He actually facilitated her employment in his office.
What do you make out of this? Lost her virginity to her Pastor at 33, and now is dating a married prominent member of her Church. In my counseling sessions, I hear a lot, I see a lot, and eventually discover a lot that is happening in secret places [realizing that my Clients don't keep much back from me. They are ready to tell everything, and all the names involved, knowing they have been looking for an opportunity to talk and unburden their consciences of guilt, so much guilt all this while], and I can tell you that there is so much sex amongst Singles in the Church, and this is not about sticking to one partner I discovered, but with so called brothers and pastors having a swell time of their lives moving around so many gullible sisters in the Church. It is a pity.
Why are these singles sleeping around? So many reasons I believe, but to make it worse when we preach don't, don't don't, and people don't do don'ts, then they will be left with not knowing the Do, Do, Do, and how to do what we are meant to do. People need to do something. Tell them or show them more of what they have to do, and give them all the assistants they need to do them. Loose them and let them go. If nothing is done about the sex scrouge that has hit the Church, she shouldn't expect so much respect from outsiders, and blessings that maketh rich from a Holy God either. It's amazing how many of our Brides are actually giving birth 7 months after the wedding and the children given birth to are not prematures.
What are the real needs of mature singles? What can be done to start having sincere relationships amongst Church members and not a situation where the brothers in the Church continue to tell lies to their own sisters, duping many of them financially with the sex trip bonuses added to that, because they believe they cannot be caught. How can the Church stop believing that she's making progress by having 18 people get married in 6 months, when there are 1 800 who are equally ready, but are not married within the same period of time because they haven't found their life partners yet?
I believe if we don't sit and talk about this sex scourge that has overtaken the Church while we were sleeping, we will remain as powerless as we are becoming already right now, full of so much talk, but less to show for it. I believe we need to promote true friendship again. Friendship that is not out to use people, but add value to their lives. Friendships that is out to make sacrifices, and watch others truly happy.
A friendship maintained over time is costly. Not only does it take effort just to keep up with someone when both of you are moving around in your first few years of your careers but it also requires even more to deal with personality quirks, misunderstandings, and slights. Lacking the willingness to pay attention and to invest emotional energy, friends become mere acquaintances – and eventually become strangers all over again.
Ever wonder why Scripture represents the church as the family of God? Why it pictures its members as sisters and brothers to one another? The deeper truth is that we belong to one another in a significant way and are expected to look out for one another in a pinch, to take up for one another when the neighborhood bully (i.e., Satan) comes calling with the sinister intent of doing real harm to one of us. Don’t forsake your highest ideals.
The most intimate of human relationships is the one between husbands and wives in our marital covenants. With sociologists telling us that about half of all first marriages are failing, something must be wrong with our thinking. Where is the “excellence” we are building into our roles as mates and parents?
Research tells us that “till death do us part” has been laid aside as an archaic convention in wedding ceremonies of late. In its place are things like “for as long as our love shall last” or “until our time together is over.” How’s that for being open-ended? For leaving a way out? For some people, what they call “love” doesn’t last into the third month. Their “time together is hardly enough to unpack."Make it easy on yourself” seems to be the rule of thumb for too many of us. So we are shallow in our Faith, careless about our Character, and weak in our
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