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Dear Presidents Around the World

My name is Bamidele Obonjo am the President of Lafta Republic.

This week, as reports of the 2009 H1N1 flu outbreak around the world were made public, my Administration has been carefully monitoring the situation, we are busy at work finding appropriate strategies to reduce the spread of Swine Flu. Our medical research team is busy developing aggressive Lafta Pills and Stem cells for the future which we will be happy to sell to your various countries.

We have noted that Swine Flu is passed from pig to pig now a pig has passed it to a human what has happened here?. Ki lo de why in South America and Europe. Ki lo de. Never in Africa would our pigs infect one another talk less of passing it to humans. Devil is a liar have you not heard of mountain of fire prayers. Our pigs eat shit , left overs pounded yam , egusi they are immune from Swine Flu.

It is rather unfortunate that we have had a number of deaths my heart goes out to the families who have lost their loved ones. As I understand it , the Swine Flu is from pigs all located abroad in particular Mexico except from Africa. I know how you all like your pork and bacon where it applies, I think your citizens now need to refrain from playing with animals. What is wrong with this people,why play with pigs , when a former Presidential candidate states that you can put a lipstick on a pig it gives people all sorts of ideas, you know.

I urge you and your Parliaments to act expeditiously in considering my important request, which is for you to replace your pigs with Nigerian/ African pigs. You need an immediate cull of your type of pigs. My nation is returniing all imported pork, bacon and we have banned them from coming into our country. There is a good selection of pigs for your use, I hope we will not have any difficulities in gettiing our brand of pigs visa to enter your various countries. I am not sure if our brand of pigs can provide you with bacon and pork because they have been raised in a tropical climate and what they have been fed on over the years makes them immune, I can assure you our brand of pigs do not play with humans

I look forward to hearing from you.

President Obonjo

Ghanian President Responds

Dear President Obonjo

on a serious note now, you know wiping all them pigs out and replacing with ours ain't such a bad idea!! As for our pigs not playing with people, I don't know about that. My woman told me about an incidence here in Accra. There was a guy employed to take care of their pigs like 4 years ago. They just observed that if the guy goes out and he's ... Read morecoming back the pigs all run to him and meet him at the gate. Also every evening about 12 midnight, there's a lot of noise in the barn where they are being kept.

One evening her dad decided to check the source of the noise, lo and behold the man dey hump tuupu dey go like mad!! I'll spare you the rest of the story. This is not entertainment!!! It's a real life happening location - Maamobi in Accra - Ghana

President Bayor

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