Have oftened wondered what it would be like if Tom Tom's could work in Nigeria. I mean a Navigator in Nigeria,so I imagine am in my Borat car on third mainland bridge trying to get back to VI from Mushin here we go
Voice on Navigator starts
Please type in your destination , Okay I want to go through Mile 2, Ketu, Surulere, Aguda, Ebute Meta, Sorry the Navigator does not recognise these destinations. Please shake the navigator well, well ensure the battery to ur cark is in working order, turn off the navigator again. Please check the make of ur navigator i hope u did not buy me from Aba market.
Yes its working
1. After twenty miles you will hit the Police Checkpoint please remember to put hand in pocket
2. After thirty miles please avoid 10 pot holes five on the left , one in the middle of the road and four on the right
3. After forty miles please slow down u are about to hit a dead body on the road. Please do not attempt to stop and try and be a samaritan just press ya foot on ur accelerator and pick race like Lewis Hamilton
4. After Fifty miles please slow down there are no lights in this neighbourhood and you are likely to have a punctured tyre for no reason at all, you are advised not to argue give them what they want, dont attempt to call the Police
5. After Sixty miles try not to turn right it leads to the cemetery , turn left and you hit the Ashewo joint , please note there are no speed limits just press ya foot on the accelerator and move fast
6. After Seventy miles you have reached your destination, please note your security guard has arranged for his friends to rob u , dont argue give them what they want after u have been robbed, get out of the car ,open your gate , go straight to bed ,read ya bible and thank GOD for protecting you and sparing your life
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