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who wants to be president ?

Posted by Akin Osunlaja WebLagosian on February 26, 2009 at 10:11pm

Thinking of becoming president ? well we have great deals on our sale week .Amazing deals on women like michelle obama on our dating site www.naija2naija.com .Extreme networking on www.9jabook.com the hottest soxl network in 9ja right now .Video clips to show you how to pose on www.9jamovies.com and wait ! we have JB himself He who wants to become president of Nigeria come 2011 Fashola willing or not ! ready and willing to guide you into the greatest year this side of the century Where slumdogs and Black men show that It takes an idea to change the world. Yes We fit. thanks for your time and maybe deep deep in our hearts we all really want to be president . I pledge Allegiance to The Federal Republic of The United States of Nigeria where the pursuit of happyness is the right of every man woman and child .....Think about it .

STRESS

Posted by LADY on February 26, 2009 at 10:00pm

StressA lecturer when explaining stress management to an audience,Raised a glass of water and asked'How heavy is this glass of water?'Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter.It depends on how long you try to hold it.If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.'He continued,'And that's the way it is with stress management.If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later,As the burden becomes increasingly heavy,We won't be able to carry on. ''As with the glass of water,You have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.''So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down.Don't carry it home.You can pick it up tomorrow.Whatever burdens you're carrying now,Let them down for a moment if you can.'So, my friend, Put down anything that may be a burden to you right now.Don't pick it up again until after you've rested a while.Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:* Accept that some days you're the pigeon,And some days you're the statue.* Always keep your words soft and sweet,Just in case you have to eat them.* Always read stuff that will make you look goodIf you die in the middle of it.* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can beRecalled by their maker.* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again,It was probably worth it.* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply be kind to others.* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time,Because then you won't have a leg to stand on.* Nobody cares if you can't dance well.Just get up and dance.* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.* The second mouse gets the cheese.* Birthdays are good for you.The more you have, the longer you live.* You may be only one person in the world,But you may also be the world to one person.* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.* We could learn a lot from crayons... Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull.Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.*A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today...I did.

I WISH U ENOUGH {GOODBYE FOREVER}

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 26, 2009 at 9:23am

vinkfbrealuvI WISH YOU ENOUGHRecently I overheard a father and daughter in their last moments together. They had announced her departure and standing near the security gate, they hugged and he said, "I love you. I wish you enough."She in turn said, "Daddy, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Daddy." They kissed and she left.He walked over toward the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see he wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on his privacy, but he welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?""Yes, I have," I replied. Saying that brought back memories I had of expressing my love and appreciation for all my Dad had done for me. Recognizing that his days were limited, I took the time to tell him face to face how much he meant to me. So I knew what this man was experiencing."Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?" I asked."I am old and she lives much too far away. I have challenges ahead, and the reality is, the next trip back will be for my funeral," he said."When you were saying good-bye I heard you say,'I wish you enough.' May I ask what that means?"He began to smile, "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." He paused for a moment and looking up as if trying to remember it in detail, he smiled even more."When we said 'I wish you enough,' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them," he continued and then turning toward me he shared the following as if he were reciting it from memory:I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.posted 2 days ago

STORY

Posted by jenluc on February 26, 2009 at 9:22am

Dear Blogers,The story on my page is not a TRUE LIFE STORY.its just a fiction, please no self pity Okay!

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Posted by jenluc on February 26, 2009 at 9:13am

When calling becomes a chore, the Love is beginning to DWINDLE.

BEING IN LOVE

Posted by LADY on February 25, 2009 at 12:20am

BEING IN LOVEWell, I told THE LORD that I love Him today. And He said to me, 'How much do you love me? You haven't told anyone how good I've been to you. You haven't shared how perfect my love is. You haven't spread the good news that I am always there to listen to your problems.You haven't told your family how I helped you pay your bills when you didn't have a high paying job, or how I got you a better one. You haven't shared with anyone how I took away that addiction that would have cost you not only your job, and everything that was just what you were looking for. So how much do you really love me?'So, I said I would share with my friends and family (for starters) just how wonderful, perfect, understanding, patient, loving, unselfish, considerate and forgiving GOD really is. He has blessed me with a family that loves me and friends that I can confide in. But even more than that, He has saved me from destruction I couldn't even see coming.He gave to me the peace of knowing Him, and He has never broken a promise. Truly He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. And I stand in my stadium today to tell to you all, 'I LOVE THE LORD!'Be blessed

Painless Labour/Delivery

Posted by LADY on February 24, 2009 at 11:34pm

A happily married couple, who were having their first baby were invitedto test the use of a new equipment and technology that would transfer aportion of the mother's labour pains to the biological father of a babywithin a stipulated diameter / distance.Of course,the expectant couple were happy to try it and the man feeling for hiswife, intended to use this wonderful opportunity to show his love byoffering to "share" the labour pain / experience with his lovingwife. The pain transfer was set to 10% but the husband felt nothing.Therefore, the doctor increased it to 20%. With a tinge of excitementhe said he felt fine and upon scrutiny his blood pressure was normal.He invited the doctor to tune it up to 50%. Still there was no reactionand he was doing okay.The doctor was amazed and slowly transferred all the pain until the Wifedelivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain! She and her husbandand the doctor were ecstatic. However, on getting home, they foundtheir gardener lying at the gate, half dead, writhing in pain!!Hmm, I'm astounded as you probably are!!

love is giving sme1 d power to break your heart but trusting them not to

Posted by ogunsanya akinbosola on February 24, 2009 at 10:25pm

love is giving sme1 d power to break your heart but trusting them not to

My pals Blog P

Posted by Don Cray on February 22, 2009 at 10:30pm

How una dey 9ja peoples!!!.

i am so psyched

Posted by angie cepeda on February 21, 2009 at 3:41am

i love dreaming of things that can happen or that would happen but good ones thoughmy favourite words are init(love that word),you reckon,whats the shit!!!am a girl whose very ambitious and believes in herselfonce i my life time i played volleyball and i woni love being lovedbut one thingi hate gossipsso do me one favour love me!!!!and i will love you too...

Get Free Hi5 Glitters

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR BOSS

Posted by Dare Ayodele on February 20, 2009 at 5:56pm

1 When you take a long time, you're slow.When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.2 When you don't do it, you're lazy.When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.3 When you make a mistake, you're an idiot.When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.4 When doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative.5 When you take a stand, you're being pig-headed.When your boss does it, he's being firm.6 When you overlooked a rule of ettiquette, you're being rude.When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.7 When you please your boss, you're arse-creeping.When your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative.8 When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.9 When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.When your boss has a day off sick, he must be very ill.10When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked

What do you think of yourself ?

Posted by Dare Ayodele on February 20, 2009 at 4:55pm

What you think of yourself is reflectedin the way you treat others.A very effective way to raise your own level of confidenceis by acting positively toward the people around you.Rudeness toward others, whether intentional or not,is a sure sign of a lack of confidence.When you have no respect or consideration for others,it's difficult to have much confidence in yourself.Ironically,one of the worst things you can do for yourselfis to think only of yourself.The more genuine respect, consideration andcourtesy you express toward those around you,the more your own confidence will grow.If someone is rude to you,make every effort to be sincerely pleasantand courteous in return.Just because someone else is allowing rudenessto drain away their own energy,doesn't mean you must do the same.Have the confidence to be courteous,and the confidence to act with genuinerespect toward others.Your positive attitude and positive actions willenergy

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 20, 2009 at 1:20pm

A concerned husband goes to see the family doctor and says, "I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time I say something, in fact, I often have to repeat things over and over again.""Well," the doctor replies, "go home and tonight and stand about 15 feet from her and say something. If she doesn't reply, move about five feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this so we can get an idea about the severity of her deafness."Sure enough, the husband goes home and does exactly as instructed. He starts off about 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen and as she is chopping some vegetables, he says, "Honey, what's for dinner?"He gets no response. He moves about five feet closer and asks again. No reply. He moves five feet closer. Still no reply. He gets fed up and moves right behind her, about an inch away, and asks again, "Honey, what's for dinner?"She replies, "For the fourth time, vegetable stew!"

MEDICAL MIRACLES

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 20, 2009 at 1:16pm

A Japanese man was boasting about how his country had such advanced medical technology. He said, "We take the lungs out of a man, perform an operation, put the lungs back in, and in 4 weeks, the man is looking for work."An Englishman said, "We are far more advanced than you. We can take the heart out of a man, perform surgery and have him ready for work in just 3 weeks."The Irishman says, "That's nothing; we can take a kidney out of a man, put into another man's body and have them looking for work in 2 weeks."The American says, "Well hell, that's nothin'. We had an idiot taken out of Texas, put in the Whitehouse and now half the country is lookin' for work!"

THE HEART OF THE MATTER

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 20, 2009 at 1:12pm

A man who was having heart trouble went to the doctor to see what his options were. Naturally, the doctor recommended a heart transplant. The man reluctantly agreed, and asked if there were any hearts immediately available, considering that money was no object."I do have three hearts," said the doctor. "The first is from an 18-year old kid, non-smoker, athletic, swimmer, with a great diet. He hit his head on the swimming pool and died. It's $100,000. The second is from a marathon runner, 25 years old, great condition, very strong. He got hit by a bus. It's $150,000. The third is from a heavy drinker, cigar smoker, steak lover. It's $500,000.""Hey, why is that heart so expensive? He lived a terrible life!""Yes, but it's from a laywer. It's never been used."

BILL GATES IN HELL

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 20, 2009 at 11:25am

Upon dying, Bill Gates went to purgatory.St. Peter said to his, “Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Now I am going to let you decide where you want to go".So, Bill takes a look at hell and see's these beautiful women running around, in 80 degree temperature, on beautiful beaches.Then he took a look at heaven and it was nice, you know harps and singing and worship and stuff like that.So he said to St. Peter that he would like to go to hell.About a week later, St. Peter went down to hell to check on Bill. There he saw him, being whipped by demons.He said to St. Peter, “What happened to all the beautifull women, and the beaches and the 80 degree temperature?”Peter replied, “That was just the screen saver"

ROSTER IN HIS DECLINING YEARS

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 20, 2009 at 11:08am

An old farmer decided it was time to get a new rooster for his hens. The current rooster was still doing an okay job, but he was getting on in years and the farmer figured getting a new rooster couldn't hurt. So he buys a new cock from the local rooster emporium, and turns him loose in the barnyard. Well, the old rooster sees the young one strutting around and he's a little worried about being replaced. He walks up to the new bird."So you're the new stud in town? I bet you really think you're hot stuff don't you? Well I'm not ready for the chopping block yet. I'll bet I'm still the better bird. And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that hen house over there. We'll run around it ten times and whoever finishes first gets to have all the hens for himself."Well, the young rooster was a proud sort, and he definitely thought he was more than a match for the old guy."You're on," he said, "and since I'm so great, I'll even give you a head start of half a lap. I'll still win easy!"So the two roosters go over to the henhouse to start the race with all the hens gathering to watch. The race begins and all the hens start cheering the old rooster on. After the first lap, the old rooster is still maintaining his lead.After the second lap, the old guy's lead has slipped a little -- but he's still hanging in there. Unfortunately, the old rooster's lead continues to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap he's just barely in front of the young fella. By now the farmer has heard the commotion. He runs into the house, gets his shotgun and runs into the barnyard figuring a fox or something is after his chickens. When he gets there, he sees the two roosters running around the henhouse, with the old rooster still slightly in the lead. He immediately takes his shotgun, aims, fires, and blows the young rooster away."Damn. That's the third gay rooster I've bought this month."

erm.......randomness

Posted by jennifer rittner on February 20, 2009 at 11:02am

Get Free Hi5 Glitters
wanna hit me i don't think you should lol!!!!it's just outta boredomno doubtI'm just like wo!!am a teenagerwanna know mewell i don't think soCHECK THIS OUT PEEPZ, BARE JOKES!Money and looks aren't everything.... But itâ€™s all I got!*I wanted to kill the sexiest person alive then I realized....Ohh ya! Suicides a crime!Don't be a guy; the world is full of guys. Be a man.Basically don't stress me, u can't impress me.Roses are red violets are blue,sugar is sweet and so are you.But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,the sugar bowls empty and so is your head.My door is always open, so feel free to leave !You laugh because I'm different I laugh because you're all the same.ALL THESE ARE ~~~~****BITCHY QUOTES~~~~****

WAYS TO TELL A REDNECK IS ON YOUR COMPUTER

Posted by DONHADLEY GIRLAND {WEBYARNER} on February 20, 2009 at 10:55am

1. The mouse is referred to as a "critter."2. The keyboard is camouflaged.3. There is a skoal can in the CD-ROM drive.4. The password is, "bubba."5. The numeric keypad only goes up to six.6. "Winders 95" has a Dale Earnhardt sticker on it.7. Outgoing faxes have beerstains on them.8. The printer goes really slow since Bubba don't read too fast.9. The extra RAM slots have Dodge truck parts installed in them.10. The menus all have Budweiser, Black Label, and Old Milwaukee options.11. Jeff Foxworthy *.wavs.12. The monitor is up on blocks.13. Seven blue tick hounds under the desk.14. Deer jerky in the desk drawer.15. The screen saver consists of pictures of Ned Beatty with Dueling Banjos playing in the background.16. The six front keys have rotted out.17. John Deere Pocket Protectors.

Contemporary Nigerian Cuisine

Posted by Funke on February 20, 2009 at 7:46am

Funke Koleosho's Contemporary Nigerian Cuisine cookbook now available on Amazon Online Booksellers.http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0956148808Order your copy now.

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Note: this page contains paid content.

Note: this page contains paid content.